How to stay in love when apart....
i think i really need to noe abt tis man....

Absence makes the heart grow fonder? Yes or no? Well, it depends! Sometimes, when you are in a relationship, your loved one may have to go overseas to study, work or for other reasons. If your husband is in the army, it can be even more difficult when they are sent overseas for a tour of duty.

You may start to miss them terribly. Your mind will be thinking of them. When you see people of the same height and looks in the street, you may even turn your head to look at them. When you are doing something enjoyable, you may even start to say "oh look, how...." and then realize he or she isn't standing next to you.

If your love is strong and deep, then yes, absence will make the heart grow fonder. But if your love was shallow, you will probably miss them a little at first, then readjust to life without them.
While your loved one is away, you may have fears of their safety, or of them straying. This is not a figment of your imagination.

If your loved one will be away studying or working for 3 years or more, it can be hard to keep the relationship going. This is because you will both be growing, meeting new people and having separate experiences. Fortunately, with email, ICQ, telephone, fax etc, it is easier to stay in touch in today's world. Imagine, hundreds of years ago, when people traveled by foot or horse, the poor wife would not know when her husband would be coming back from a business trip! Communication is the key. When your loved one asks, "how was your day?" If you reply, "it was ok" and you both stop there, you're not communicating. You'll get bored with each other, and absence will make the heart grow further apart. So, tell him exactly what happened in the day. It may be boring for you, but it'll be something new for him! And it make him feel like part of your experience.

Aside from communication, trust is the next factor. A friend of mine told me a hilarious story. Once he was in China on a business trip, and he had to go from town to town to negotiate with the different hotels. His host would always politely ask him, "would you like to take a nap?". My poor married friend, ever devoted to his wife, thought they were trying to get his favor by offering a "lady". He would hurriedly say no and rush out of the hotel. He did this for several weeks until he got back to Beijing when he met up with his colleagues. After exchanging notes, he realized that his hosts were just being polite, and that in certain areas he went to, they did indeed take afternoon naps! There may be temptation and opportunity for your loved one to stray, but trust that he or she will be true, and you'll have an easier time while waiting for them to come home!


| Lady Gadget Hackwrench C r u i s e d A t 4/15/2005 11:02:00 PM |