All the things we do...

all the things we do...sometimes makes me wonder..isit worth it? goin thru all the shit sometimes super duper double shit..met up wid my frens eversince im back..met my sistas..my ole sec sch gals..my poly mates...my band guys...some of my climbers...my excolleagues...all different sets of people..different mindsets of life which makes me ponder on life....those competitive ones and those laid back ones...who gains in the end?....so ive concluded..thats life. nothing is fair..either one party be selfish and the other gives in or the other way ard..i used to think everything could be compromised. so the situation would be a win-win thingy..well thats what they taught me back in TP..compromising is the best thing to do...but sometimes i think wining is still the best...guess depends on the situation right?

after evaluation, i feel that ive not been treating myself well. ok not those kind where you go for retail theraphy thingy...but those decisions in life that you make. when i was down in OZ, i blamed my parents for making me go through my degree. for making me feel that the decision for a degree was decided by them and i have to do it..the only decision making on my side was that i could choose where to do it. so being the rebellious me, i choose to do it overseas. yah people...this was the main reason why i did it overseas instead of SG..anyway the programme that i wanted is not offered in SG..ok got the twining thingy but not a recognised degree by the govt. i needed a back up plan also. in case i don stay in the industry, i could still work in the govt agencies. i thought that i don need people there. running away from all the problems and starting anew there...

but to those who have been reading my blog, u guys would know that my life there started very rockily esp with school. the amount of support i had with me wasnt enough to sustain me throughout my life there. i broke down so many upteen times...till a certain point of time, i just wanted to end it all. just book the next flight home to sg..okla i did think of the worse but not courageous enough to do it..so the worse thing ive really wanted to do was to fly back to sg.

well that was the first semester..the first time i am away from everyone in my life. another semester is here..another phase of life begins..hoepfully im ready..

PS: wah i jus found out that my polymate is there now..starting her first sem..wuhoo..hopefully can meet up..yahoo!! another fren fron SG is gonna b there!


| Lady Gadget Hackwrench C r u i s e d A t 7/20/2005 10:59:00 AM |